on care networks and hyphae
by Sav Schlauderaff
When I speak about care networks, I imagine the roots in the forest
The xylem and phloem passing up and down the trees from their roots to the veins of the leaves hanging off the branches. Determined by the environment, nutrients and needs. That these needs shift and change with the seasons. Translocation requires communication and energy; and teaches us that the parts of the plants that make the energy for the tree transport it to places that can’t.
When I speak about care networks, I imagine us as a fairy circle
Small, low mushrooms on a patch of grass just behind my house
Our mycelium, soft and connected below in the wet damp dirt
The hyphae growing towards each other
And not at all something like a rhizome that academics like to talk about
I imagine us sitting in our new homes
Just like we are now
The necessity of technology now to facilitate our conversations
You, in a forest way up in northern california
Me, in a desert with horses across a now dried up river bank
You, making the perfect tea 12 time zones away
You, on a beach sitting in the sun
You, contemplating bangs for the fifth time
You, always so far, so busy, so sad, so tired.
We’re all so tired
I’ll give you my energy when I can
Just call me along our not-so-imaginary roots
We’re all connected by thread like that one Fiona Apple music video
I’ll remember to be honest when I call
I won’t say I’m fine
I think our roots need some tending
They are being stretched so thin lately I fear they will snap
Will they repair once we are back together?
Once we feel better?
Once we’re not so tired, and sad, and lonely, and in pain?
Can you feel my pain too?
How can we remember not to pass our pain on to each other?
Can we transform it into an energy that will feed and support us?
I have so many questions, but for now I just miss You.